…Assembly Fully Complete

July 29, 2007

Since moving down to Lincoln, I’ve slowly been turning into a middle-class surbanite, and what better way to complete that transformation than a trip to B&Q on a Saturday afternoon to purchase a lawn mower. We didn’t stop there, of course: they had a deal on garden furniture, and when there’s 50% off tables and chairs in the wettest British summer since 1500BC, you’ve simply got to lay down the green. Right?

Anyway, this meant a joyous afternoon mowing the lawn with my Bosch Rotak 320C (feel the power!) then assembling the new garden table. I don’t know where this thing was made, but the instruction booklet was one of the most poorly written pieces of garbage I’ve yet seen for self-assembly furniture. To wit:

“Pull the top right & left than fold it down to get it folded. Assembly fully complete.”

Sweet. I mean, what could be clearer?

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